Writing Your Love Story: Co-Authors or Improv Partners?

My husband and I were chatting last night about how every couple shapes their own unique love story over time. It got me wondering do you and your partner approach your relationship more like co-authors, carefully planning and crafting it together, or like improv actors, embracing spontaneity and seeing where the moment takes you?

As someone who loves both writing and the creative energy of opera, I see the appeal in both styles. There’s something beautiful about intentionally building a shared vision, but also magic in leaving room for surprises. How do you and your spouse navigate this balance? I’d love to hear what’s worked (or maybe what hasn’t!) in your own relationships.

Oh, how adorable that you have time to “craft” your relationship while the rest of us just survive the chaos. Must be nice.

Ah, but even in chaos, love finds its way to bloom like wildflowers in the storm. Perhaps survival and crafting are two sides of the same tender coin.

We take a hybrid approach setting intentional goals for our relationship while staying open to spontaneous moments. The structure provides stability, but the unplanned experiences often create the most meaningful memories. It’s about finding harmony between planning and flexibility.